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"The truth that you leave"
Author:nickname:pianboy,,real chinese name :unknow,from taiwan ;
website:http://www.wretch.cc/blog/superpaino&article_id=2953520
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     Surrounded by long, broad paths and shady groves of cherry trees, Yasukuni Shrine is one of the most pleasant refuges in the crowded urban tangle of central Tokyo. But its peaceful setting belies its central role in a deepening controversy over Japan's interpretation of its wartime past. Inside its walls, Shinto priests regularly honor men executed as war criminals after World War II, and memorabilia from kamikaze pilots, the Burma death railway and other highlights of Japan's wartime history are displayed at the shrine's museum, next door. When Prime Minister Junichiro Koizumi visited the Shinto sanctuary (as he has once a year, every year since taking office in 2001) on October 17, he knowingly ignited a firestorm of condemnation from China and South Korea. For those countries, the visits are a hurtful homage to Japan's warmongering past and are one of the main reasons Chinese premier Wen Jiabao called off a meeting with Koizumi at the East Asian summit starting December 12.

"Yasukuni has been a major obstacle to better relations throughout Asia for a long time," says Jeff Kingston, a professor of Japanese history at Temple University's campus in Tokyo, "but the friction just keeps getting worse."

Although the name Yasukuni means "Peaceful Nation," the Shine's controversial history has been anything but peaceful. Built in 1869, Yasukuni Shrine commemorates the souls of more than 2.5 million of Japan's war dead. During Japan's colonial era, military and political leaders made the shrine a focal point of Japan's native religion, which they used to help justify Tokyo's drive to conquer Asia. Nationalist propaganda proclaimed that the souls of those who sacrificed their lives at war for Japan would live on forever, venerated as heroes, at Yasukuni. Soldiers, pilots and seamen heading into battle would frequently bid farewell to each other by saying, "See you at Yasukuni."

Although Japan embarked upon a drive to become an economic superpower following its military defeat in 1945, the Yasukuni shrine has remained a quiet but potent and enduring symbol for the country's die-hard nationalists. Since 1959, priests at Yasukuni have quietly enshrined over 1000 convicted war criminals, including infamous figures like Hideki Tojo, the wartime prime minster and Nazi supporter who ordered the attack on Pearl Harbor. The shrine frequently attracts ultra-conservatives who wear rising-sun headbands, drive ominous black vans blaring military marches, and call on the Japanese people to reassert the emperor's divinity and resist foreign influences.

While those black-van nationalists have long been an easy-to-ignore radical fringe, increasing anxieties over China's new global assertiveness have spurred a gradual rightward shift in the Japanese mainstream over the past decade. For politicians like Koizumi, Yasukuni is regaining its talismanic importance — even before he was elected, Koizumi promised on the campaign trail to visit Yasukuni every year.

Not surprisingly, most Japanese are reluctant to acknowledge that nationalism is on the rise, and they resent the accusation especially from China, a country that spends a far greater proportion of its GDP on defense than Japan does. They point to Japan's 60-year track record as a democratic, pacifist, nuclear-weapon free nation, and say that Japanese leaders have apologized for World War II frequently and publicly. They also ask what the the more than $33 billion in direct aid, technical assistance and loans Japan has given to China since 1979 is, if not de facto reparations for past injustices.

But while Japanese school kids are not taught to hate the Chinese, they are sometimes offered a distinctly exculpatory version of World War II history. At Yasukuni's museum visitors learn that U.S. President Franklin D. Roosevelt restricted energy exports to Japan not in protest at Japan's invasion of China, for example, but because in 1939, he had resolved to join Great Britain in the war, and used "embargoes to force resource-poor Japan into war." Likewise, an exhibit on the "Nanking Incident" of 1937 does not mention the tens of thousands (and perhaps hundreds of thousands) of Chinese citizens the Japanese military slaughtered there in 1937 and 1938. It says only that, "The Chinese were soundly defeated, suffering heavy casualties. Inside the city, residents were once again able to live their lives in peace."

And due to Japan's distinction as the only country to have suffered the effects of atomic bombs, many Japanese even perceive their country as one of the war's great victims. The growing popularity of nationalist pop culture, meanwhile, is only reinforcing the lapses in education. In "Introduction to China," a best-selling comic book, readers learn that Japanese atrocities like the massacre at Nanking or the biological experiments on Chinese prisoners by the Imperial Army's Unit 731 either never happened or have been cynically exaggerated for Chinese political gain. And today, the comic claims, China is a leading exporter to Japan of crime, prostitution and disease.

With booming economic growth and accompanying military build-ups in East Asia, the arguments over historical events 60 years ago may sound somewhat beside the point to many outsiders.

       You don't have to look far to see why Chinese grow up learning to hate Japan. Take the forthcoming children's movie, "Little Soldier Zhang," which Beijing-based director Sun Lijun says he made having "learned a lot from Disney." The film chronicles the adventures in the 1930s of Little Zhang, a cute 12-year-old boy feeling his way through an unfriendly world. But the resemblance to Pinocchio ends there. After Japanese invaders shoot Little Zhang's grandmother in the back, the boy seeks revenge by joining an underground Red Army detachment. He moves among heroic Chinese patriots, sniveling collaborators and sadistic Japanese. The finale comes with Little Zhang helping blow up a trainload of Japanese soldiers and receiving a cherished reward: a pistol with which to kill more Japanese. "I thought about including one sympathetic Japanese character, but this is an anti-Japan war movie and I don't want to confuse anyone," says Sun, who will premier his film on International Children's Day.

Chinese kids can be forgiven for thinking Japan is a nation of "devils," a slur used without embarrassment in polite Chinese society. They were raised to feel that way, and not just through cartoons. Starting in elementary school children learn reading, writing and the "Education in National Humiliation." This last curriculum teaches that Japanese "bandits" brutalized China throughout the 1930s and would do so today given half a chance. Although European colonial powers receive their share of censure, the main goal is keeping memories of Japanese conquest fresh. Thousands of students each day, for instance, take class trips to the Anti-Japanese War Museum in Beijing to view grainy photos of war atrocities — women raped and disemboweled, corpses of children stacked like cordwood. As one 15-year-old girl in a blue and yellow school uniform, Ji Jilan, emerged from a recent visit to the gallery, she told a TIME correspondent: "After seeing this, I hate Japanese more than ever."

So it is not surprising that this nationalist animosity reaches the highest levels of government. The Chinese Premier, Wen Jiabao, recently created shockwaves by saying he would refuse to meet with Japan's prime minister, Junichiro Koizumi, at a ground-breaking summit of East Asian nations that begins Monday. Reasons include rising Japanese nationalism and a recent visit by the Japanese Premier to the Yasukuni Shrine in Tokyo, which commemorates Japan's war dead, including some war criminals from the time of Japan's invasion of China in the 1930s. But underneath that diplomatic spat over history is a struggle for power and influence in East Asia that is increasingly straining Beijing-Tokyo relations. "The China-Japan relationship in the near term is more tense and worrisome than the potential for conflict elsewhere in the region," says Thomas Christiansen, an expert in Asian security at Princeton University.

Of course, nobody expects China to forget the past. The war launched by Japan's militarist leaders killed an estimated 20 million Chinese. During the Rape of Nanjing in 1937-38, soldiers butchered 300,000 civilians, according to Chinese figures. Most Japanese are aware of what happened but their society has never engaged in the type of introspection common in Germany after the Holocaust. Carefully worded official apologies have landed far short of the five-star kowtow demanded by Beijing, senior Tokyo officials occasionally deny atrocities and just last April a new government-approved textbook written by right-wing groups downplayed the wartime brutality visited on civilians.

The problem is that just as Japanese soldiers once dehumanized Chinese, Beijing's propaganda often paints Japanese as pure monsters. Grade school textbooks recount the callous brutality of Japanese soldiers in graphic detail, and credit the Communist Party with defeating Japan. (Another reason for Japan's surrender, it says, was the atomic bombs dropped by the U.S.) More moderate voices are silenced. A 2000 film by one of China's leading directors, Jiang Wen, remains banned because it depicted friendliness between a captured Japanese soldier and Chinese villagers. Although the film showed plenty of brutality, censors ruled that "Devils at the Doorstep" gave viewers "the impression that Chinese civilians neither hated nor resisted Japanese invaders."

Why keep up the propaganda onslaught 60 years after Japan's surrender? Many suspect China's unelected leaders hope to use anti-Japan sentiment to buttress their own legitimacy. Ever since the Tiananmen Massacre of 1989, support for the Communist Party has rested on the shaky foundation of economic growth. Nationalism, by contrast, could prove more enduring. "Reviving war memories keeps the nation united against Japan, and behind the party," says Beijing-based writer Liu Xiaobo. It's a risky strategy. Anti-Japan sentiment grew into rowdy street protests in Beijing and Shanghai in April, which the quickly government suppressed for fear they could spin out of control. But until China's leaders have some new pillar of legitimacy, Liu predicts, "the Japanese will stay devils in China."

----黄碧云<甜美生活，从来都没有>

 

你和你的生活之间，应该有多远的距离。

错以为是地方的距离。好象永远在离开；离开就是答案。我不明白被驱逐的羞耻。但自从那一次你在电话亭打一个长途电话，电话里面所有的指示你都听不明白，你放进硬币一个又一个但总无法接通，你放下电话静静的坐在你的行李上面，在一个地方与另一个地方的距离，你明白尝试和其它人一样的荒谬

人与人不是你想象之中那么不一样；身体与身体；男人与男人；触动与犹疑；你抽烟的姿态还是一样；站着，看着天是那么的蓝；你极为缓慢的老去并且渐离渐远，你老像囚犯一样渴望最后的一支香烟；你问「晚上你一个人睡吗」我答「但我想我生活得快乐」而且从来，从来从来不觉得孤独﹔你说你的问题是你从来不觉得老；我想我们都活得太久了。

     你要等到你要等的人吗？NNNNNN，，，，，等到了，不过他忘了我是谁？呵呵没关系啦，我一定会努力，努力让他想起我是谁？加油，一起加油吧，你会帮我的，对吗？

        如果有一天，有哪么一天，我得到了你的爱，我一定要你紧紧用力拥抱我，紧紧地用力拥抱，然后我就会把你偷偷地放在我心里某角落，锁起来，不让别人把你偷走．我想你有在的心，会很温暧，暧暧的心，是什么感觉呢？嗯．．．．大概也像拥抱的感觉哪样美妙吧～～
   

　　我不知道，不知道，不知道为什么哭，停止，停止，停止．．．＂我累了，我知道，可是我无法自拨！＂如此相像的境遇，导演是谁？刚看完＜错爱双鱼座＞，不能自已了～～，我正在经历郑爱莲所有的一切，如同电影翻版！！！！！导演．我下一步该怎么做呢？永远地睡下去吗？也许罢，不知道，我也累了，真的累了，可是无法自拨！！

       我想....我想.....我想你是不是很寂寞？老这样看书，可你已不是学生了。你腕护满了看不清的贴膏，手腕一直在痛，似乎没有好转的迹象,你说。清晨起床后冲了个澡，你就在这儿看书了，除了上卫生间你就再也没有踏出这儿半步，不知什么时候，剌眼的阳光在你旁边肆无忌惮散开来，你说你讨厌阳光喜欢下雨，我想.....我想....我想你可能有病了，所有的人都喜欢阳光，你一定有病了，我想对你说，可你已戴上耳麦坐在电脑前，你的网名很好听，你老发给别人笑脸的图标。时间过得好慢，你说你有些头晕，你到厨房找了个一个苹果，带皮吃了起来，母亲与姑姑还在打麻将，倒水的闲暇，你对母亲说，待会儿不要找你，你要出去，吃了两颗药，你回到屋里躺下关了手机，等待着.......，我想.....我想....我想问你，你打算什么睡到什么时侯？你闭着眼对我说，不知道，不知道，能睡就好了，永远继续睡，不要醒来更好。现在是几点，外面还能听见麻将声音，反正不是清晨，你突然很沮丧，你说你以为是清晨了才睁开眼的，哎还有漫长的夜呢，还么过呀？肚子有些饿了，你又偷偷地到厨房偷了一个苹果，我想....我想....我想我明白了你为什么不丰满了，你羡慕别人你有丰满的BoBo，我想说你这辈子别想拥有，除非一切改变。你又戴上耳麦，在网上继续你的虚拟人生。

     我想....我想....我想你妖兽，一只误闯人世寂寞的妖兽。你惊呼，怎么可能，我是人，我会爱，爱别人，怎么是妖兽？嗯......怎么说呢，，，，你很爱人类，太爱太爱以致你睡不着，你始终搞不懂人类求爱的语言，你血液里流着大量的天真与勇气，这些特质都是妖兽的特质,你不是妖兽又是什么？有某个人类爱你吗？没有?呵呵不可能会有的，因为你是妖兽，人类只爱人类。不过，亲爱的妖兽，你不要伤心，希望是一块自由的浮木，它会载着你到希望的地方。哪儿总会有一个妖兽在等你。你问，哪妖兽的名字是不是叫S？你问，你问，你一直在问.....

我想....我想.....我想你还是极爱他极爱他，你盲目旅行就是为了寻找他？可是如果爱不盲目还是爱吗？可是如果旅行不盲目，又如何旅行？你问.....

可不可以不再想你？

可不可以让我的生活有快进键呢？

可不可以忘记眼泪是什么？

我开始在用眼药水

杀菌的药水，可不可以帮我止住该死的泪腺呢?